Housekeeping

If you have offered help, I have forwarded all the names and emails I have to Melissa - I think her email says Mel and not Melissa, I haven't actually typed it out - she's doing the organization for us.


Today I had to decline an email for a volunteer position at school that I would really enjoy. Sad about that - I'm not quite sure how new normal lends itself to me spending time at school. Is it even safe to then come home to Anna? Probably not.


Anna is basically housebound for the next few months is what I'm understanding. She can have healthy people come to the house but she isn't to be around any crowds. I have numbers that stipulate when/where and what her counts need to be do anything either large or small group but since they are hanging out at zero, and should be there for some time, here we are. No church, no school, no eating out, no shopping, no movies...she literally spends her time in our house or our yard. Maybe someone else's house in a bit if we can rely on the germ-free-ness of not having sick kids.


We have rules for what she is able to eat and what she isn't able to eat on her immuno-suppressed diet. Kind of similar to pregnancy diet - but more strict. Funnily enough she can still have fast food. We are to tell them she has cancer and that she needs perfectly fresh french fries or whatever - she can't eat anything that has been sitting out.

Today I told someone that my daughter has leukemia and I didn't burst into full-on tears - progress? My eyes did well up, not totally cold and heartless, but no sobbing to strangers today. I did cry a lot but mostly when we were talking to one of the home care nurses (I totally forget the title) and we started talking about her hair. I feel like such a freak but this makes me cry every.single.time. It is freaking hair! It will grow back! I'm actually more worried, but that isn't the right word; about what color it will be when it does grow back. Please, I totally know - you don't need to say it.


I think there was one more thing but my mind is gone. Scattered - like sands in the hourglass or ashes in the wind - or lobsters in the sea ;) I just gave myself a little chuckle with that one. "I'm outta here!"